Dustyhawk :: Broken Mirror

She laid on the bed, lifeless. Even after a heart transplant and a transfusion of the essence she would not speak to him. The eyes were wide shut, she would not speak a word to Serge. The doctors didn’t know what was wrong, was it the heart ? Couldn’t be as another heart was tested. Was it the essence ? same thing as before. Could it be the vessel that contained the heart and essence ? That is something which they did not answer.

So it will another day that she lays out in the cold lifeless in a comatose like state. This does not bode well to Serge as important things need to be done with her. Without her it’s like airless day. The suffocations is hard on his throat. Oh how he wish she would show some sign of life. The only good news that was told by the doctors, is that her memory from days of longer ago will be alright.

For the whole bloody day till night yesterday, Serge was trying to get his deviantArt to open. Open it did, but it keep timing out everytime he wanted to upload a deviation. And to upload is considered a hassle since there are more than 4 steps (depending on the category) just to upload 1 bloody item. For the love of deviators out there please create a software for us. Better yet create a software for subscribers, and if there is…someone do tell Serge about it, for he just did not pay RM100 for a 1 year subcription just to be screwed like that. And from 2300hr till about 10 minute ago, DA just would not open. Such sacrilledge must not occur ..EVER AGAIN.

On a serious note, mental help is needed for the state of Serge. He seems to enjoy what he is doing right now to those who is close to him, but it hurts those who are close. He sees the effects, but like a devil’s temptation fruitcake he wants it to continue. Oh how the hurt grows with every passing moment. Sorry can’t be said anymore, the hurt has begun. Trust broken, Deceit begins.

Worthy he is not, thus stop calling him that. He knows his sin and this cannot be forgiven. Oh how he wish he wasn’t even born at all, that his existence is erased from the mind of everyone that knows him.

so it’s true what his mom said, everytime his Louisa-VII hit the bucket for the unobscene time…during that week Serge becomes quite lifeless. How bloody true. To him Louisa-VII is more than a woman…she wants to be clicked to be warmth to be push to the utmost limit until she breaks. But not until she actually breaks.

Another reality check is that he doesn’t know what to do now. To continue on with this or to end it. The good the bad of it has been shown, he knows about it. If he did choice A then the life of those in choice B will be destroyed hearts destroyed. Likewise if choice B was taken in.

Sorry about all of this, to those who is left dangling in the middle of it all. Serge needs time, a lot of it. Yet he feels that he is just trying to runaway from what is needed to be done. But if he does not know what needs to be done, how can he do what needs to be done and pull that trigger that can either make or break what he has build in the months prior to the incident.

[13:38] [^Xeon^] really bad thubderstorm in Petaling Jaya area
[13:38] [^Xeon^] like Zeus ulti wif refresher orb…scary

If one plays DOTA, you will know the joke. And seriously the thunderstorms here are bitchingly bad.

-quick promotion of Blogathon

he just went for the event which seemed to be a good event, however due to the fact that he has to work tomorrow he is not staying until the whole day, Albert completely forgot about the event. Fear not, for Serge has photos which he will post up in his gallery later today. Depending if he feels like it.

Another 4 days before his sister comes back with a new phone for serge. An old k750i model, hopefully it is that. He would go for this latest W-range of Sony-Ericsson, but he has a Zen Neeon for his listening pleasure. So the k750i will suffice.

To Albert pics here